The Path

Today I’m thinking about the path that I’m on…

This morning a friend asked me, “Have you always been so happy?”

My answer was, “NO!”

I wanted to explain, but before I get to that, let me set the stage…

My wife and I have gotten into the routine of visiting our local coffee shop on Saturday mornings, which I really enjoy. I’m kind of a loner in real life, and most of my day is filled with solitary activities or being with Cyndi. Getting “out on the town” on Saturday mornings is one of the few things I do outside of my own home, and I’m usually in a good mood.

When Elise asked me if I was always so happy, I started thinking about it.
I don’t want to spend too many words on this because I want to get to the good part, the happy part, but just so you know where I am coming from, my first thought was remembering the way I was as a teenager.
According to my mother, I was aloof and sullen.
I resisted any kind of authority; school, church, and government.

Thinking about School: It seemed like my social choices were “jock, nerd, or freak” and I chose “freak”. I desperately wanted to “be cool” the way I thought cool should be, but I never felt that way inside. I was extremely self-absorbed and self-conscious.

Thinking about Church: We had to go to a Catholic church where the priest was quite old, and seemed extremely unhappy himself. I was taught the basic Santa Clause model of “If you’re good, you win and if you’re bad you don’t”. Most of what I was taught beyond the fear-based “Heaven or Hell” Sorting Hat didn’t make sense to me, and it didn’t seem like anyone around me had the answers to my questions.
I dropped out.

Thinking about Authority: I was raised in the 1960’s and the “peace and love” hippy culture really resonated with me, but as a teenager in the 1970’s, I wondered where everybody went. Many of our leaders seemed unethical to me (War and Watergate), and it seemed like the fun was gone. So many counter-culture icons had either radicalized, drugged out, split up, disappeared, gone to jail, or died.

To summarize, I can say without a shadow of a doubt that,
“No, I wasn’t happy back then”.

All that came rushing back to me when Elise asked me if I had always been so happy.

The second thing I thought about was feeling sorry for the way I treated my parents. I mentioned it to her, but the coffee shop was busy and I didn’t think it was a good time for a long rambling response about my life story.

But it was a good question…

The fact is, I DO feel happier these days!

So, What Changed?

Well, part of it is that, back then, I was interested in a lot of things in a curious sort of way, but I couldn’t think of anything I would be happy doing for a living. In my culture the question was frequently asked of ALL children,
“What do you want to BE when you grow up?”
and I never had an answer for that, and it made me extremely anxious.
Years later the question had morphed into,
“What are you going to DO for a living?”
and I was still no closer to the answer.

So now I’m going to skip a lot and just say that

• I learned a trade that I enjoy, and
• I met my wife and we raised a healthy loving family together, and
• I live in a great community, and
• life is much more comfortable than it used to be.

So, there is no reason NOT to be happy, right?

But I don’t really think that answers the question completely.

Maybe some would be very happy just to have those things, and I understand that. But for me, there is something more, and her question to me this morning inspired me to try to explain it. Although I am so grateful for those blessings, and I feel like I am one of the lucky ones in life, it doesn’t completely answer the question of why I feel happier now than I did back then.

When I really think about it, I’m sure it has something to do with the path I’m on today.

-=< O >=-

Of the three types of previous unhappiness I mentioned above; personal, religious, and authoritarian, the one that I’m thinking about today is related to the religious one.

Don’t Panic!
I’m not going to try to convince you of anything!
I’m not even going to use any bible verses!

I think much of organized religion has gone wrong,
and it has caused much unhappiness in the world.

At the age of 37 I made a conscious decision to try and FORGET everything I was taught as a child, wipe the slate clean, and start over. That turned out to be more difficult than I imagined, but what helped was learning some of what the bible really says. I was already partially familiar with the New Testament, but except for a few children’s stories like Noah’s Ark and David & Goliath, I really didn’t know much about the Old Testament. I’m here to say, some of the things I have learned about the real bible story has made me a happier person!

The bible story can be thought of as a tapestry that is difficult to see the overall image, but once you start to understand the big picture, many various threads start falling into place.

Here are TWO of those threads that have been contributing to my happiness:

If there is a God, he wants a partnership with us
The bible story teaches that he was with us in the beginning.
His garden showed us how to organize the chaos of the natural world to provide for us, and his desire was for us to spread out, have babies, and make more gardens.
According to the story, something happened that separated us, so:

• He created a way to be with us through the Tabernacle, which was a portable structure that could stay with his people, the twelve tribes of Israel.
• Then he tried to be with us through the Temple, a permanent structure.
• Then he came to be with us through Jesus, a living structure.
• And the best of all possible scenarios – Jesus accomplished something that enabled God to be with us directly.

After Jesus left the earth, the story of Pentecost tells how the Holy Spirit came out of the temple and into the believers. Inside of them! No garden or building required. It sounds incredible, but the bible says he can live inside of us, in our impure state, even though we don’t deserve it. In this way, every person on earth can participate in the Kingdom.
We can be an earthen vessel for him, a jar of clay.

The more I think about it, the more amazing it seems.

The thought that I can invite him in,
that my life can play a role in the Kingdom here on earth,
that my life can be a residence for him in the world,
makes me happy.

-=< O >=-

If there is a God, he respects our right to choose
The type of society he wants can be compared to a Good Shepherd whose sheep follow him willingly. He wants people who choose to be with him, but what does that choice mean? Some people who are confident in their salvation (hoping for eternal life with God) seem to hate the world.
They seem to be waiting to die so they can “go to heaven”.
But the bible says, “for God so loved the world”, and doesn’t really talk much about “going to heaven” or “going to hell” at all. In fact, it hardly ever mentions that concept! They just weren’t thinking in that way.
(ok, maybe I used a bible verse in there, sorry about that!)

The bible speaks much more about establishing the Kingdom of God HERE ON EARTH. Right now.

The bible teaches that there is a way to know who is working toward this goal and who is not, by the fruit that their life produces.

A person in the light will produce spiritual fruit like:
love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, self-control and charity. 

The fruit produced by a person living on the selfish side of the line is just as easy to identify:
deceit, greed, envy, pride, slander, adultery, theft, murder and wickedness

Once you know what to look for, it’s easy to see the fruit.

To be honest, at any given moment I may choose to be selfish.
I can’t seem to stay in the light, and maybe you can’t either.
I consistently stray off the path.
My fruit is not always the good fruit.

-=< O >=-

I’m trying to stay on a path that produces the good fruit, which helps to establish the Kingdom of God here on earth.

The thought that my life can be a point of light in the darkness has made me feel more fulfilled as a person.

My participation in a goal bigger than myself has made me happier.

by the way:
In both of the tapestry threads above I used the phrase,
“If God exists, then…”.
If it turns out that what I suspected was wrong,
and God DOESN’T exist,
I will have no regrets about how I lived.

(Thanks for sharing this time with me)

-=< O >=-